I had an ending in mind for TGD’s “Parenting” (4.8) episode
before it ever aired. In fact, I wrote it out, printed
it out, and took this picture of it (!) alongside a January 24th newspaper in a weird effort to prove I’d come up with it in advance (should the actual show come up with anything remotely similar).
They didn’t come up with anything remotely similar. What they DID do, less than a minute after the final #Shea scene of the episode, was knock us over with you-know-what… and I’d all but forgotten my “alternate ending” in the aftermath. But here it is anyway (I’ll just repost it here quickly so you don’t have to blow up the picture):
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Near the end of the episode… after whatever goes down goes down, and at least a partial amends is made… A situation presents itself where Mike Dilallo (who has proven himself at this point to be supportive of Lea/Shaun, or at least is coming around to the idea of doing so) is alone with Shaun for a few minutes before he and Pam Dilallo fly back to Hershey.
In expressing his approval to Shaun, he reaches into his pocket and produces a diamond ring. A family heirloom. He wants Shaun to consider using it “when the time is right.” (BONUS POINTS IF HE INDICATES IT’S THE RING GRANDPA ROD USED TO PROPOSE TO LEA’S GRANDMA.) “I’ll… consider it,” Shaun tells him once he’s processed the idea.
IF we were to see Shaun and Lea together in a scene after this one… say, she rejoins him after the parents have driven away or whatever… she’ll say “What was that about?” And when Shaun doesn’t answer right away, she’ll follow up with “Just… tell me you two ended things on a good note.”
Shaun will then simply respond, “We did.”
(Such a scene between Shaun and Papa D would be perfect for a “previously on The Good Doctor…” clipshow leading into whatever episode it turns out to be that Shaun pops the question) 😊
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(Shrug) I couldn’t help myself. BUT, that would have also been telegraphing the future in a way that TGD may simply not want to do.
ANYWAY… Lots to talk about with this, arguably our most #Shea-ful episode since “Friends and Family.” Speaking of which, did you notice the distanced way that Shaun spoke of parents throughout the episode? Whether it was the opening scene (“We’re adults… why would it matter what your parents think?”), or the minute of discussing what the different doctors call their father (Shaun thought “coach” was as good a term as any, referencing the 14-year-old gymnast case-of-the-week; most of the other docs objected), or the way Shaun referenced Lea’s parents in the past tense-- twice-- as if their work as parents came to an end when Lea became an adult. It makes sense if you’re him, right? His parents didn’t do much, let alone anything positive, by the time he’d turned 14. No wonder the concept of winning parental approval was so foreign to him!
But, in yet another lovely extension of “I care that YOU care,” Shaun took the attitude If it’s important to Lea, it’s important to both of us and ran with it… all the way to the Dilallos’ hotel, in fact.
Was that your favorite part of the episode? What a thrill to have so many scenes to choose from, right? For me, I think the fewer expectations for a particular element of the story= more enjoyable overall.
Before I list the seven #Shea/#Shea-related scenes from “Parenting” in order of personal favor… I think an honorable mention is in order for the scene between Shaun and Claire that prompted the simulation dinner. Not only because it’s always nice to see Shaun interact with Claire-- his longest-standing ally at the hospital, outside of Glassman-- but because of something noteworthy Claire said in that scene: “You are who you are… and who you are is great!”
A great thing to say, but did anyone else wince a little, remembering Lea’s words on the bridge last season at the end of “Fixation”: You are who you are, and I am who I am… and the two of us will never work….?
I wonder if “Parenting” scriptwriter Patti Carr was aware of that exchange?
Oh, and I also found the way Shaun said “It does… but I need pizza” adorable.
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OK, 7 favorite scenes in order… here we go:
#7: “I’m going to email you some talking points, mostly subjects to avoid… it’s gonna be a very long list.” (OPENING SCENE)
This, our tip-off for the rest of the episode, is lowest on the list simply because its purpose is the simplest (setting the pace and tone of life in the land of #Shea for the episode). Interesting that it was not only the leadoff scene, but it came at us “cold,” with no establishing shot (exterior of St. Bonaventure, or cafeteria wide shot). Just Lea, delivering the news about her parents’ pending “ambush” to Shaun pretty much as she received it. Not a second to spare in “Parenting,” I guess!
But we had enough time to assess what would be the mood for both characters throughout the show: Lea anxious, agitated and upset, Shaun generally laid back (although he certainly had his more anxious moments once he understood Lea’s concerns better).
Another interesting note: This was the first time since last season when Shaun and Lea were sitting in the cafeteria talking, and Shaun ended things abruptly when his phone chimed (“I have to go”). Pre-coupledom, Lea just kind of watched him dart off with medicine on his mind. Now, we hear her kinda sorta excusing him (“Fine…”) and then following up with the directive about her subjects-to-avoid texts. Which, of course, she started sending immediately.
(NOTE: Technically speaking, I know Shaun left a #Shea conversation abruptly at least one other time this season-- I’m thinking of right after Lea told him she’d move back into the apartment-- but since it wasn’t his usual pop-up-and-go spot, AND since their conversation was basically over anyway, I’m letting that one slide.)
P.S. For anyone wondering why the 1985 NBA Draft Lottery was on Lea's "avoid" list... 1985 was the first year a Lottery was used, and according to this video, it was able to be "rigged" as a result. (Highly unlikely that Shaun would ever discuss basketball at all though, which leads me to believe she's given a similar "list" to many boyfriends in the past that met her dad.)
#6: “They might want to yell at us, in which case we should not open the door…” (CLOSING #SHEA SCENE)
If I was directing this episode, I would have included a shot (or shot sequence) that showed Mike and Pam’s faces as Shaun closed the apartment door on them. I get why (“Parenting” director) Rachel Leiterman didn’t; there was definitely a laugh to be had the way she did it. I just think there might’ve been a little extra wink of satisfaction if they did it my way. But Leiterman’s way was less conventional/expected, so I’ve got to respect that!
Anyway, after Shaun’s takedown in the hotel lobby we figured there would be some sort of pleasant resolution, right? Not for all time, necessarily—what would be the fun in that—but extending an olive branch in the form of taking Shaun and Lea out to dinner (sorry pancakes-in-progress, maybe stick around for a midnight snack later?) was a fine way to go. And with Mike and Pam having to text their request to Lea through the closed front door, #Shea had the opportunity to discuss the matter before accepting… another example of them handling challenges together.
Lea left the decision to Shaun—and whether it was because he’d made the last move in the situation (gotta presume Shaun filled Lea in his hotel lobby visit, right?) or simply because her parents’ issue had centered around him all along, it was the right way to go. As for Shaun’s response—“I think… they must’ve been good parents. I think we should have dinner with them.”—it was classic Shaun in its simplicity. Could the question of whether or not they were “good parents” really be solved by their decision to come spend some more time with Shaun and Lea before going back East? Of course not. But in the moment, they were doing what they could to mend some of their damage… and judging from the apologetic look on their faces when we DID finally see them at the door, that was good enough. For now.
#5: “I’m in character; please address me as ‘Pam.’”
Admittedly, this scene prompted some expectations for me as soon as the publicity photos went public. That’s why it’s down here at #5--I couldn’t help but overlook a very missed opportunity with Morgan at that table. My thinking is if you’re not going to use her but for that early exchange… and the “twisted biotch” doesn’t get to throw even one dart in Lea’s direction… why not put Debbie in there instead? I think that could’ve been a lot more interesting, if only to help Debbie drum up some sympathy points for Lea ASAP. (Many of us see Debbie/Lea as fast friends waiting to happen, you see…)
Maybe Sheila Kelley (Debbie) was who they wanted, but wasn’t available for COVID-recovery reasons or otherwise… so the chair went to Morgan. In any case, the focus shifted rapidly from Lea’s parents to Shaun’s “parent”... let’s talk about that:
Glassman hijacks the conversation midway through (apparently concluding that Lea’s scripted efforts weren’t worth the trouble… another small jab) “what happens when Lea’s parents express real concern about their daughter?” – and just when you think he’s going to go where it needs to go (because that’s where it DOES go, with Mama/Papa D), Glassman says “Concerns any parent would have” and hits the basic (and, incorrect) things as if they were both neurotypical: You two barely know each other… You haven’t dated very long; now you’re living together … This relationship is moving too fast!
Quite a statement from the man who essentially asked his current wife to marry him after only one date, no? Glassy the Grouch… DUDE… come on. (Maybe THAT’S why Debbie wasn’t utilized; because the hypocrisy of Glassy’s statement would have been too glaring to overlook.)
Thankfully Lea came right in with her sound, assured retort (“You’re wrong,”) before explaining to a befuddled Shaun that this was not Lea telling “Mike” off, but Glassman himself. Not to worry, though, for Shaun was about to bring his own variety of Glassman-directed shade to the conversation…
“You can’t prepare for how these evenings can go wrong, Families are full of surprises—” Glassy began.
“Like how you don’t like Lea,” Shaun interrupted.
CRICKETS… CRICKETS… CRICKETS “I never… actually… said that.”
Here we have “surprise” served up at least three different ways:
“full of surprises” much more than anything that went down at the real dinner.
2) Shaun didn’t seem aware of the continued discomfort between Lea and Glassman until Lea pointed it out that morning in the cafeteria. Hence, that too was a “surprise”…
3) … But it was a surprise exactly as Shaun delivered it. To Glassman’s face, there at the table, right in front of Lea (and Morgan). And it seemed like more than an ill-timed honest moment on Shaun’s part. They ended the scene on a shot of Shaun, and he looked pretty displeased with Glassman to my eyes.
4) As far Glassy’s slow, no-way-to-save-this denial? Well, maybe that much wasn’t a surprise at all.
#4: “They don’t. Not the most. Not anymore.”
First off—I know everyone on the set of TGD is a grown-up, but I must admit I hope there’s an outtake of the beginning of this scene that has Paige Spara unable to keep a straight face as Freddie says I searched “eating meat near me”, which was a mistake…
I mean, COME ON. That was hilarious.
Okay, on with this scene. An excellent point made by reader Daniela in the comments on my last post: even though Shaun’s response about Lea’s parents supposedly loving her most in the world was endearing and sweet and maybe just what Lea needed in that moment… well…”He doesn’t know what he’s talking about,” Daniela said. She’s referring to the fact that different kinds of love (familial, romantic, etc.) don’t have to compete for real estate in one’s heart-- the kind of thing Shaun hasn’t dealt with yet in adulthood, but might understand better
if/when he becomes a father. Maybe that’s why Lea appeared to under-react to that particular confession of love from Shaun; she appreciated it immensely, but...
As for “Leave it to my mom; she took us both out in one shot”: I KNEW the bigger problem would be with Lea’s mother! The first red flag cropped up with Shaun’s earlier-season note that her voice gets annoying “especially when she talks to her mother on the phone” (Newbies)... that’s anxiety he hears creeping into Lea’s voice when dealing with Mama D.
How about her relationship with her father? My guess is they have a certain, somewhat limited closeness. I didn’t get the impression from this episode that he’s the overbearing type; on the contrary, he may be argumentative (as came up repeatedly in Shaun’s dinner prep), but I don’t think he digs into the heavy issues with both hands. That might be a hint to a bigger issue with Lea and Papa D, which in turn could be representative of Lea’s relationship with men in general up to now: he’s approachable, but only about things that interest him (maybe he helped Lea cultivate her love of cars, for instance… along with Grandpa Rod of course). Anything personal? Anything emotionally fraught? Why don’t you go talk to your mother about this. And IF Mama D. has had issues with “self-medication” during Lea’s lifetime—still a question mark, as it obviously didn’t come up in this episode—that means she too was surely unavailable, mentally and/or physically, for Lea at times. Lots of distance, not a lot of positive reinforcement-- or time taken to even find out what her best qualities might be (other than the very general “a big heart”-- Papa D’s words in the hotel lobby).
So there, that’s my unofficial diagnosis of Lea’s low self-esteem roots! I’d love to hear whatever clues YOU drew from the episode…
Aside from the clarity given about the Dilallos’ take on #Shea, there was a certain symmetry to enjoy with the general topic of the scene: It was a rare discussion on how Shaun deals with “civilians” (people who aren’t his family/colleagues/patients), and for all the ways Shaun, and others with ASD, are seen as socially immature… it’s Lea who questions her ability to be grown-up enough to work through her parents’ issues.
By the way-- there wasn’t time of course, but it also would have been cool to acknowledge what was different when Lea was “the person who met him” 3 ½ years ago… why she wasn’t uncomfortable around him.
#3 “I suggest we treat this evening like hemorrhoid surgery.”
The highest expectations probably went into this scene… and generally speaking, they were met. Plenty of tension, punctuated by several awkward laughs (mostly courtesy of Shaun).Still…
I really expected more awkward questions… the ones Shaun fielded were more patronizing than anything else.
No ex-husband reference AT ALL after the previous week? Really?
And while we’re on omissions...no brother Donnie reference either??
I know time was limited, and I almost feel bad complaining because we got A LOT in this episode. But I feel like they could have made room for at least ONE reference. They could’ve dropped Donnie’s name at dinner; the folks could’ve mentioned the ex in the hotel lobby. Seem like easy fixes to me.
Otherwise, I made these notes about the Dilallo dinner:
Lea’s “Want more wine?” that came between Shaun’s “Hemorrhoid surgery!” and Pam D’s “Excuse me?” was a reflexive attempt to change the subject; she obviously was worried about where Shaun was about to go with that statement. A sign that, while she’s grown accustomed to Shaun’s dialogue quirks, she still may be uncomfortable with them in certain company.
When the story about hemorrhoid surgery turned out to be a perfectly amusing ice-breaker, the relief on both Shaun and Lea’s faces was visible from outer space.
- Shaun’s hemorrhoid talk was actually his own way of
diffusing a specific tension rising between mother and daughter. Pam said “Honestly, Lea, if we’re so impossible to talk to, why even have us here?” and Lea shot her a look that, had Shaun not interjected at that point, would’ve followed with “I didn’t have you here, Mom, you insisted on it and this is why I’ve dreaded tonight ever since.”
The laughter that followed the hemorrhoid talk was welcome, but I could feel the patronizing undercurrent getting even stronger than when Mama D asked Shaun if being a surgeon was hard “for him.”
By the scene’s end, Mama and Papa D’s evening had turned into “OK, this is cute, we’re game for the night… but absolutely no more than that.” Cue the text (I’m assuming it was actually a series of texts) to Lea the next day.
#2: “You knew her then… you don’t know her now.”
We’d been waiting for this one.
Not because we needed to hear Shaun reinforce his love for Lea, or defend his ability to be in a relationship with her—that’s not what this was about. What we needed to see was Shaun standing up for her. He’s done it all along, mind you… to Glassman, to Morgan, to Vera-down-in-the-earthquake, really to anyone who’s ever said anything negative about her. But to track the Dilallos down at their hotel with the specific purpose of not only defending Lea, but finding the right words to turn them around at least a little bit? And do it all knowing a) verbal communication is especially difficult for him when upset, and b) his trademark “brutal honesty” is not likely to be appreciated?
So yes, this was rather epic on Shaun’s part. A few specific notes I made:
1) When Papa D politely dismissed Shaun near the start of the scene (“No offense, Shaun, but this is between family”), I half-expected Shaun to respond with Lea is MY family… but that’s not Shaun, is it? To him, it’s still a great honor just to be able to call Lea his girlfriend.
2) Mama D saying “And she’ll do anything to get under our skin; you wouldn’t believe some of the people she’s dated…”—just me, or did anyone else take that to imply Lea was only with Shaun as a new way to piss her parents off? If so, maybe she was under their skin in a new way, with a relationship so above-par they didn’t know what to make of it. So, annoyed and confused, they defaulted to what they knew best and assumed the worst is still lurking on the road ahead.
3) Honest to God, though, how could they still think that after letting Shaun speak his peace? Even if they focused on the ways he (gently) turned the mirror on them--“All you know are her mistakes, and you don’t trust her because you’re not sure you were good parents… I make Lea patient because I can be very frustrating. So can the two of you… Maybe this challenge will make your relationship stronger, too”—that’s got to be the most respectful and thoughtful way they’ve been treated by anyone in Lea’s life. Maybe by anyone, period!.
4) It’s a longshot I guess, but I’d love to know that some TGD fans “on the fence” about #Shea—or maybe just Lea—saw a little of themselves in Pam and Mike Dilallo and may become more amenable to the couple themselves after this episode. If you happen to hear of any let us know, OK?
6) Finally, who didn’t love the shot of Shaun taking a congratulatory green apple for himself as he walked away? I would add that he should’ve treated himself to a stack of pancakes on the way home, but maybe that’s why he and Lea were eating them in the final scene😉
#1: “I’m not going to stop worrying about him. Even if he doesn’t need me to.”
“Stop it! You’re gonna make me cry,” Lea snarked when Glassman initially came over to her in the St. B café (best name I’ve got for this particular locale). But by the end of the scene, both she and Glassy were on the verge of tears for real, weren’t they?
The demands for this scene may have been considerably fewer than others in “Parenting”—no new characters to put across, no true plot-advancing dialogue, a lot less tension coursing through the characters at hand—and maybe that’s why it was my favorite. But it helped that what was done was done so well.
The tension was still there, but it ran on two lower levels: the semi-amusing, “Glassy-still-doesn’t-like-Lea” level established at the start of the episode, and whatever undercurrent remained from the last time we’d seen Glassy and Lea in the same room. Which was, of course, the brewpub in last season’s “Hurt” episode.
Unless she were to “make (Shaun) very, very sad.” But let’s not put that cart out before the horse anytime soon; plenty of other things to worry about. For now, I’m enjoying that these two finally share a mutual appreciation for each other’s role in Shaun’s life. If Shaun ever needs a solid example of the heart having room for (at least) two different kinds of love, he should look no further than these two.
Oh, and Lea cleaning Glassy’s tie was a marvelous way to end the scene.
44 comments:
Thanks Kelli! Nice catch with that “You are who you are…”, I had not made that connection yet, but I’m sure it was deliberately place, just a many other references in this and the previous episode. For example, for his speech to the Dilallos, Shaun was putting to good use to what he witnessed in episode 106 “Not Fake”, when a judge said the same about knowing a son now and then to parents and a bride were arguing about amputating the groom’s leg.
And in another theater, Lim just said “I don’t need saving” to Claire, just as Lea did before in the very scene another line alluded to. We all know how this turned out the last time the sentence was heard on the show… But let’s not get ahead (again)…
With 408 “Parenting”, a story arc came full circle that started way back with 310 “Friends and Family”.
In season 3’s mid-season finale “Friends and Family”, Shaun’s story reached a pivotal point. He confronted his abusive father, getting some form of closure. Putting the specters of the past to rest and with almost no family ties left, Shaun was ready to build a new family of his own choosing, an arc that went toward professing his love for Lea (to himself as much as to her) as well as Lea returning it.
To begin with, both episodes are similar in structure and deal with the shadows family history casts over the lives of characters. There’s only one instead of two medical cases (although technically 408 split the case into two patients), so that more time could be allocated to the main plot.
Episode 310 also stressed the strained relationship between Glassman and Lea. Though, it took its time for the sober and sincere scene about the responsibilities of parenthood. Glassman formally accepting Lea now in episode 408 was a late but necessary conclusion to that. With Grumpy second dad Glassman and Lea coming to terms, Friends have finally turned into a family.
It is also noteworthy, that in episode 310 Lea mentions for the first time how difficult not only her brother is, but her family in its entirety. “Parenting” starts right there with her parents’ surprise attack on their child’s nerves. And the show’s cold opening mimics and enforces this.
Concerning the parents insinuating that Lea is dating autistic Shaun just to get under their skin – I definitely took it the same way you did, Kelli. Just as asking if it was hard to be a surgeon [pause] for Shaun, this was a barely concealed blow against Shaun’s autism as well as the motives of her daughter. It is also very close to everyday-prejudice I face. I’ve been ask many times why I don’t look for an autistic girlfriend instead. Obviously, many neurotypicals can’t fathom the idea that a woman might be sincerely attracted to a man with ASD. As often, TGD was close to reality.
For me, this and episode 4.05 were the best episodes of the season so far. I'm really under the impression that most of the episodes this season must have had several deleted scenes, probably as a result of the arrival of the new characters. Let's wait for the DVD.
I was expecting some uncomfortable question from Lea's parents about her and Shaun having considered marriage or children, as for some theoretically it would be the next step after living together. It looks like this discussion will be for another day, although I think it will still take place this season. I wonder if that diamond ring on a patient's stomach in episode 4.07 was foreshadowing...
On another subject: every month the SpoilerTV website makes a poll of the best performers of the month in TV series. For those interested, you can vote for the cast of The Good Doctor for the episodes 4.06, 4.07 and 4.08. Freddie Highmore was nominated in the past for episodes 1.10, 2.01, 2.17, 3.16, 3.18 and 4.05. Paige Spara was also nominated for the episodes 3.16 and 3.20.
For those who want to vote: https://www.spoilertv.com/2021/02/performers-of-month-nominations-for.html
For anyone interested, I would recommend reading the rules on the link. In short, you fill out the form and can do it up to five times, but each must be for a different actor or actress.
Ever since Morgan discovered an earthquake kit in Claire’s trunk right along with her mother’s ashes and it turned out to be of significance, I watch the duo with some extra vigilance. So, it sure gave me a Spock-eyebrow when they found a diamond ring in that patient’s bowels.
Though, we are too early in the story for that and episode 408 (and the subsequent promo*) made clear that there are other important steps to take beforehand.
In consequence, “Parenting” was a meditation about when it is the right time to stop being a child and start to think of oneself as an adult as well as to know when the moment comes for parents to let go of their responsibilities as caretakers.
In the process, we discovered that by now Shaun has figured out how he makes Lea more, too – he brings balance to her character. This part of his speech to the Dilallos was a less literal, yet important callback to previous events. Season 4 is weaving a fine net of character continuity with the recent episodes.**
While Shaun got another chance to shine with his growing social capabilities, this episode was very much designed to give us a better understanding of Lea’s psyche and how her parents have impacted her just as was Shaun by his family (or lack of).
While Shaun had to deal with an abusive father and abandonment by a weak mother, Lea’s story is that of a teenager rebelling (marriage right out of high school!) against a judgmental, domineering mother and a subservient father who tries to mediate and accommodate (take note that all the hard talk was done by Pam while Mike, albeit clumsy, tried to diffuse some tension).
Shaun lacked parent’s love, Lea obviously lacked her parent’s affirmation. Which might explain her low self-esteem. For describing herself as needy, she in fact is constantly seeking (self-) affirmation. Thus, she readily accepts Shaun’s praise of her perfect body in front of the newbies in 403 and even stresses how enjoyable her breasts are. That’s why Shaun’s mention of her voice had such a devastating effect on her. And that’s why her parents’ verdict still matters to Lea, although Shaun early on points out that it is of no consequence because they’re adults.
Looking at Lea’s family history this way, there is some resemblance to how Morgan the “little plodder” (313) is troubled by her artistic mother. And I wonder if this is another reason why Morgan was– again after 306 – part of a rehearsal for Shaun’s benefit when Debbie would have been a much more logical choice to accompany Glassman in a private setting.
With “Parenting” getting to the roots of Lea’s self-esteem issues, it makes sense that the next episode(s) are likely to hit Lea in her weakest spot. With the cause identified the treatment can begin, although it might get worse before it gets better.
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*) And perhaps the more urgent foreshadowing of this scene was that the patient swallowed the diamond ring because her fiancé cheated on her… we have been warned *gulp*
**) With this in mind, it is also understandable that Morgan was part of the practice for Shaun again, although this might as well have been a preparation for Morgan’s own arc to continue once the mid-season troubles blow over; her latest remark about needing to get out more was uncharacteristically candid about herself. Also, Morgan looked quite uncomfortable witnessing the dispute about Glassman not liking Lea – which is certainly unusual for the self-proclaimed “cold-hearted bitch”.
Thanks Kelly for this new post and for this beautiful place you gave us to exchange our points of view :)
I would have liked a few more lines from Morgan during the simulation dinner too. I also agree regarding the first place on the list of favorite scenes. I really needed that scene between Lea and Glassman and Richard and Paige's performance was great, there's a lot of chemistry between them.
Allan said "I was expecting some uncomfortable question from Lea's parents about her and Shaun having considered marriage or children". Well, I've been thinking the same from the moment I saw the promo. These questions did not come from Lea's parents in the episode, but I think that their concern about these aspects is contained in Papa D's statement in the in the hotel scene "she just doesn't think ahead" referring to Lea.
As for the ex-husband issue, I'm under the impression that the reason why the parents didn't accept any of Lea's boyfriends is related to the fact that they never accepted Lea's marriage ending. I suppose Lea's parents were the first to expect that marriage. Perhaps that was such a profound disappointment that it radically changed the dynamics within the Dilallo family and above all the parents' trust in their daughter. Maybe the idea that their daughter would do anything to get under their skin is a consequence of that disappointment, therefore any boyfriend Lea would have dated would never have been appreciated by the parents because he would be compared to the "boy next door". I am glad for their reconciliation at the end of the episode, but I think that in the future her parents will reappear and bring new issues, especially related to the figure of Mama D.
First of all, thank you Kelli, for mentioning my comment in your post. I feel honored!
You covered almost every base, so I’ll try to offer a different angle with my analysis, in the effort of not being repetitive.
I think that Parenting was a well-rounded episode, that offered different point of views, exploring the relationships between parents and children. It was beautifully written and perfectly acted. Every single plotline was spot on (case of the week included), and everything was well balanced and enjoyable. All in all, this one was surely the best episode of the season so far, and one of my best episodes of the series.
What I’m appreciating the most about season 4 is the way they are slowly picking situations/dynamics from previous seasons and trying to tie the knots. And it happened in Parenting too.
The storyline about Lea’s parents was a good way to address her insecurities, and the way Shaun handled the parents was great, a little predictable, but effective! And I think that Shaun’s speech was also intended for all the Lea haters among the audience, not just her parents (“You knew her then”).
But, let’s try to proceed with some order.
I believe that, among the many themes addressed in this episode, a central one, was the relationship between Lea and Glassman. If you think about it, Glassy was brought up in the very first scene, when Lea asked Shaun: “Doesn’t it bother you that your grumpy second dad Glassman still doesn’t like me?” It’s clear that she was deeply bothered by that. And it’s understandable. Lea’s parents might have posed a challenge to them in the episode, but they would have jumped on a plane and got back to the other side of the country very soon, anyway. So, she obviously would have felt hurt for a while, but she would have quickly put it to rest. The same couldn’t be told about Glassman, because he was there every day. And his attitude towards Lea was probably a constant reminder of her parents’ very attitude.
Obviously, Shaun didn’t understand her point of view immediately (“We are adults, why would it matter what your parents think?”). As it usually happens with him, Shaun needs to feel something first hand, before getting a concept right. And he ultimately did, because during the practice dinner, he looked quite hurt, after Glassy failed to provide reassurance about him actually liking Lea.
You mentioned Shaun being very detached when faced with any topic involving parents, Kelli. But I was actually very surprised about how open-minded he was about it, instead. Do you remember his “I hate fathers”, back in season 1? That was the product of a long-lasting trauma, of course. But something has changed after Friends and Family, like Andreas said. He finally moved past it. In the cafeteria scene, Shaun did not hurry to correct Lea about the way she referred to Glassman as his “grumpy second dad”. He simply and calmly answered: “Dr. Glassman likes you”. Again, character’s growth and stories coming full circle.
About the practice dinner scene, I agree with you, Kelli, about the fact that having Debbie there would have made more sense. Also considering that the practice dinner quickly became a family bickering of its own, preventing Morgan to contribute more. She actually looked quite uncomfortable.
But I’d like to examine Glassman’s bluntness in particular. We don’t usually like it when he is so straightforward about things. Many fans were ready to kick him right in the butt, while live tweeting, during the episode.
One could say that Glassy can be as brutally honest as Shaun is, but without having ASD. So, when he behaves like that, we like to say that he’s grouchy and grumpy (to use Lea’s words). Okay, I agree, maybe he went too far with the “You barely know each other” thing (but I’m sure he meant as romantic partners). However, it turned out that he was right in his assumptions: Lea’s parents’ issues were not about Shaun’s ability to engage in small talk, during the dinner. They actually even liked him (“You’re a very nice young man”). They were just worried about their daughter being in a challenging relationship, because they believed she wasn’t mature enough (till then, she probably hadn’t given them any reason to believe that she was a mature person). So, the parents weren’t being judgy just for the sake of it, they were worried, as any parent would. Young people usually find it difficult to figure out the reasoning behind their parents’ opinions, but Glassy was ultimately very right in his prediction, because he shared the very same concerns. Everything was resolved in the end, because of course Lea has changed, a lot. Like Shaun said to her parents: “You knew her then”.
But the best scene of the entire episode is without any doubts the one with Glassy and Lea. It was so raw and emotional, and it ranks very high in my personal list of the best scenes of the entire series.
Now, Glassman is a complex, very human character, with his virtues and his flaws. He’s a proud and reserved person most of the time. Very rarely we saw him being overly emotional, and when that happened, it was usually about his daughter or Shaun related. Shaun is his weak spot, the hole in his armor. And I give all the credit to Lea for having been so good in making him open up to her about his true feelings. Her “I don’t want Shaun’s parent to have a problem with us too” was the perfect thing to say to him, and it made the trick. She really has grown a lot!
With both his words and body language, Glassman shared the depth of his unconditional love for Shaun. What he basically said is that Shaun’s joy is his joy, and Shaun’s pain is his pain. And that he simply couldn’t help worrying about him, even if he trusted the person Shaun had become (“Even if he doesn’t need me to”). Well, only a parent can feel that way.
Richard Schiff’s performance was outstanding and heartwarming. Paige Spara was equally great. They brought tears to my eyes, and obviously Glassman’s words reached Lea’s heart too. In that moment she understood that it wasn’t about her, and she came to accept and respect Glassy’s point of view, and maybe even her parents’. When she smiled sweetly at him and reached out to clean his tie, it was an open gesture of affection. Glassman pulled away at first, on instinct, but then he let her help, as a sign of trust.
This was a pivotal moment of understanding between them, and a solid basis for the further development of their family dynamic (someone commented on Twitter “Best father-in-law – daughter-in-law” ��). I agree with Andreas when he said that the friends have become family. Again, full circle. I can’t stop watching that scene over and over.
It was so powerful, that it made me optimistic for the remaining part of the season ahead, no matter how hard they try to get us thrown with those damned promos.
Sorry for being so long. Ideas kept flowing and I didn’t know how to stop them!
Long comments mean more brain fodder, that should always be welcome. 😁
Mary, your take on Lea’s relationship to her parents deteriorating because of her failed marriage is quite reasonable, especially because it offers the writers a good opportunity to have the parents cause further problems down the road with said ex-husband being on good terms with them. They are the most likely ones to give him her current address for that skiing machine.
And I concur with Daniela that the most important plot point was in fact the scene between Glassman and Lea. The striking emotional pay-off stems from the performance of course, but also from fact that this resolved a storyline that was carefully carried along ever since Glassman stormed Lea’s apartment at the beginning of episode 110! For a TV series, this is an epic dimension.
And we should take extra note that when Glassman becomes most vulnerable and reveals his raw emotions, it most often with Lea. It is started with him getting the (false) news of the cancer returning in 212 “Aftermath”, went on with him pondering about being smacked around by life at Shaun’s hospital bed in 218 “Trampoline” and the almost shed tears over Maddie in that motel room in Wyoming in 310 “Friends and Family”. With the air cleared between them, can we now anticipate reversed roles down the road? 🤔
Overall, great episode, with interesting and meaningful scenes for Shea but also other characters, and the newbies not taking up too much screentime!
I love how the Glassy-Lea scene seems to be the favorite scene for many Shea fans! It was indeed long overdue. Personally, as i had mentioned in a previous post, it was a scene with this type of exchange between those 2 characters that was at the top of my wish list for some time. I like Glassy, but I've also had mixed feelings on the character because of how unfair he often was to Lea, still being cold to her after she helped him in season 2 - accompanying him to medical appointments and making him have fun during the go-karts session -, accusing her of toying with Shaun as a hamster in season 2, receiving her coldly for the interview in season 3, not accepting her way of seeing things in regards to Shaun's father (he was wrong in thinking that Shaun HAD to forgive his father as he was clouded by his story with his daughter).But Glassman was also portrayed as someone who is indeed grouchy, marked by tragedies in his life, closed off emotionally, and most importantly very protective of Shaun. So it stands to reason that he was scared that Lea would hurt Shaun and because of that was wary of her. But we saw also that he was not against the idea of her being Shaun's girlfriend: he said to Lea in 2x18 "he likes you you know" "he likes you more", and in 3x16 he said to Shaun "what if she says 'I love you too'", and as you said Andreas, Glassman tends to open up when he talks to Lea. And he at least recognized that she's smart and reliable professionally since he put her at the head of the IT department. So I think that it's not really that Glassman didn't like Lea in the first seasons, it's more that he was afraid she would hurt Shaun, but also that he didn't know how to talk with her because of her personality that's so different from his (but being with Debbie it should have helped him...).
As for the scene in 4x08, it was great that Glassman finally complimented her but also confided that he doesn't have a problem with her, it's with anything or with anyone that would hurt Shaun. Seeing both on the brink of tears was touching, and the final moments of Lea showing affection by cleaning Glassman's tie and Glassman accepting it after first pulling away were a nice way of showing that they came to an understanding, that they like each other, and as you mentioned Daniela that it is a sign of trust.
I'm with you Andreas on hoping that we could see the roles being reversed between them. It would be heart-warming to have Lea open up to Glassman and Glassman taking the time to listen and reassure her.
The reason I like this scene so much is also that the scene is long enough to give time to the characters to talk, and to do so slowly and with some pauses to convey the difficulties of the characters to open up about what they feel. It's what is often missing in TGD but also other shows which are very calibrated in how they tell stories, and which results in quite short scenes following one another at a certain space or less short scenes but with quick exchanges between the characters. It's a shame, because a longer scene with a slower exchange often allows to add momentum to the words being uttered, and it can give an actor a chance to shine even more; as much as the end scene in 3X16 is hard to watch, Freddie and especially Paige's performances were so great, helped by the long pauses the actors were allowed to make to convey the emotional turmoil of each character. That's what i want to see more of (among many other things^^).
Other than that:
- I wished we had seen Morgan talk with Lea in the dinner scene, it's a missed opportunity, but it's indeed probably a lack of time and because the dinner rehearsal's focus was in fact Glassy and Lea. And as to why it was Morgan and not Debbie, it could be explained by the fact that the dinner was prepared very quickly so they came directly from the hospital to the apartment, and Morgan was thought to fit the role of Lea's mother the best given her bit***ness. I liked that Shaun seemed to realize what it meant for Lea to have her parents like him after his "second dad" Glassman didn't deny not liking Lea.
- i felt bad for Lea when her parents didn't trust her to be in a challenging relationship, and it was shocking when Lea's mother implied that she was using Shaun to get under their skin, which also contradicts what she had just said about Lea having a good heart. I loved the part of the scene at the hotel when Shaun talked about her parents not knowing het now, and how they make each other better and face challenges together.
- The scene with Shea in a hallway of the hospital is in my top 3. The sincerity conveyed in each other's eyes, the deep sadness of Lea and Shaun softly saying her name and trying to make her feel better with his story of how people view him, of course the "No they don't...Not the most...Not anymore". Although I agree that 1) for the former it would have been nice if Shaun had mentioned that Lea had been among the few people who readily accepted him when they met and 2) for the latter, Shaun indeed doesn't yet understand what love is in regards to a parent for child (just as he doesn't yet fully understand the difference between lust/physical attraction and real romantic love...). Sidenote: being French and sometimes having slight trouble understanding some words being said, it took me several seconds to understand "eating meat near me" and what it implied!
- the dinner scene with the parents: i didn't expect the question about the vaccine...it was a good way of bringing up Shaun's autism while showing Lea's mother being judgemental and having preconceived notions. She's indeed the most problematic parent between the 2.
I also hoped that Lea's brother and Lea's ex would be brought up, but they had once again no time for that.
Well done, Kelli, as always! And as a fan of radio countdowns and college sports, rankings are always a special treat!!
Since you did that, I'll address the gold mine of scenes we got in episode order.
OPENING SCENE
In addition to the NBA Draft Lottery, I also noticed "drummers" in the quick-fire list of taboo topics. Funny little jab at some previous Shea interactions from 2 seasons ago.
On the idea of her parents dropping by "unannounced", that takes some commitment to do that from cross-country!
PRACTICE DINNER
I agree that the Glassman-Morgan pairing was odd. I seem to remember Shelia recovering from the virus sooner than Richard, which makes me skeptcial about that being the reason Debbie wasn't there. But I do appreciate Shaun mentioning pizza earlier, allowing us to fill in the gap to how he recruited Morgan for the cause.
I'm sure it was part-intentional, but I think Glassman was either hypocrictal or flat-out wrong. Even if you take his "barely know each other" to mean romantically, that's still quite off - as they've been together for several months by this point!
But then again, there's no law saying characters have to always be factually correct. I'll just attribute it to Glassman being swayed by his concerns.
REAL DINNER
This was an A+ scene for me! I think ANYONE could struggle with awkward conversation. I know it's something I dread. But the way Shaun handled that encounter is truly a mark of a master! And even if he didn't win them over as a suitable romantic prospect at that point, it was awesome to see him at least connect with them on a conversational level!
HALLWAY CONVERSATION
I love how Shaun never flinched when Lea suggested that her mom's text was an insult to both of them. He didn't deny it - which is important. But even better, his priority was addressing Lea's emotional distress at the moment. And also importantly, he didn't feel like he "failed" just because the scene didn't end with a smile and an "it's all better."
It's a great reminder that everything doesn't happen - or get resolved - all at once.
HOTEL LOBBY
This has to be one of Shaun's finest moments! It almost feels like the show took my very own reasoning for preferring the Shea pairing, and encapsulated it into a way only Shaun could express. I still maintain that there is no other pair of characters on this show as MUTUALLY beneficial for each other as Shaun and Lea. And as others have mentioned, I loved the grabbing of the apple!
LEA/GLASSMAN
I don't put this quite at #1...yet. It was an absolutely beautiful scene - perhaps the finest yet between Lea and Glassman. But I see it as a "step" in the greater development for these two - rather than a great culmination.
It was sweet seeing Glassman's reasons for his worry full of things that weren't Lea-specific - at least in my opinion. Because the truth is, anyone who makes Shaun THAT happy has the potential to leave him really sad.
We've gone from somewhat of a rivalry, to a place of understanding. But the Lea/Glassy journey is not done yet. My hope is still for a time to come where there's unequivocal acceptance, perhaps when Shaun and Lea are at an even greater stage in their relationship. Should this happen, I very well may go back and retroactively make this my #1 scene of the episode.
DINNER SCENE
Even though we didn't hear it, I love seeing the happy "little moments" like the Shea conversation as the scene began. It's a great reminder of how they don't just enjoy the highs, but the "everyday."
I echo the praise for the conversation we DID hear. They showed a mutual love and respect, and allowed us to see them truly "function as a unit" just like we were promised going into the season. BRAVO!!
I didn't get the "Eating meat near me" joke immediately either, Syl (I'm Italian)😉
Indeed Syl, TGD usually operates with quick cuts and short, witty exchanges. This sure is partly owed to viewing habits of Generation Youtube with a shortened attention span as well as the structural problem that a show focused on the titular character tries to accommodate a way too large cast within 43 minutes.
Yet, when Glassy, Lea and Shaun get down to serious business, the show slows down considerably. This is very much due to Richard Schiff’s acting style but it also works for Freddie Highmore and Paige Spara when given the opportunity, such as in the ending of episode 316.
Now, could somebody please fill me in why this “eating meat near me” is so funny to native speakers???
Sorry to leave you in suspense Andreas-- I'm just now catching up on the comments! Since no one else has responded... I think searching "eating meat near me" turned out to be a mistake for Shaun because he likely ended up with a list of either gay bars/hangouts or personal ads from people looking for a sexual hookup of some kind. The "eating meat" = fellatio.
Did I get that right, readers?
(Laughing as I type this... if I got it wrong PLEASE, someone, set us straight!)
Hey!!!! Well, finally found the time to post something here.
As always loved the post and the comments of course, "Parenting" to me is easily among the best episodes ever during the four seasons of the show so to have the opportunity to express what I felt while watching it is amazing.
First, I think that your idea Kelli could have been the perfect ending for such a sweet episode. However, why don't you keep the hopes that maybe someday in the future we will be having a serious talk between Dad Dilallo and Shaun concerning an engagement ring, why not? I believe that we have not seen the end of the Dilallos in the show yet, I'm considering this as an apetizer only for other scenes in the future.
I totally agree with the order of the scenes, to me the scene between Glassy and Lea was superb not only because of the acting (Richard and Paige nailed it) but because the scene itself was so moving, when she cleaned his tie and said "Well, if Shaun saw that stain on your tie, it would drive him crazy" that mere phrase implied that for her Shaun's worries are important too. It was like she said "I think about him too, you know?" Totally moving.
I have noticed also that the writers are like addressing haters in a kind of way and when Shaun spoke to her parents, he was in fact talking to all of those who still don't believe in Lea's good intentions with him and their relationship (I think that someone said this too in the comments).
About Claire's statement of "you are great" yeah... it sounded like a glimpse to the past recalling what Lea said to him in Fixation, and I'm sorry but I'm not that fan of her telling him this when there is a majority of people who are still rooting for them to become the main couple eventually, I see this option very far tbh but why to feed those who still believe it?
I feel that overall the episode was amazing, well actually it has the highest score in IMDB (8,0) of the season and also it reached the highest rating of the same so I think that many people agree with us on this.
I feel that the series has to remain on this path, sometimes I sense that there are too many characters and too many stories to tell when already Shaun's and Shaun and Lea's story is very complex and needs time as we saw during this episode without forgetting that everyhting seems to be connected with the stories of the patients, The good doctor does it so well on this field and it was well achieved in the "Parenting" episode.
I want to see what else they have in store for this season starting with the episode 9 airing on February 15 and on, because until now I feel that Shaun and Lea have proven to be able to solve things together (Their communication and the trust they have with each other are one of the best things they have as a couple) and they are able to overcome any obstacle, however there are still unsolved things and as Paige said in an interview "But then again, when you are in a committed relationship with someone, there are nuances that come with that, that you don't necessarily get from other people, but you can get triggered by the person. We're going to be exploring that. From what, we're going to understand why those triggers affect her in a way, and these new triggers will be explored because of her past and as her own person". Following what we have seen so far, she was triggered by his comment on her voice, and now the visit of her parents... so let's see what else is in store...
Thanks for the post!!!
Hahahahahahah I searched for it and you are right... Trying to erase the images of my head hahahha
Thanks Kelli! I wasn't familiar with that slang. Funny note: I typed that sentence into Google and in fact got only restaurants near my position...
Plenty of good posts, plenty of good thoughts!
With so many high praises about the Lea/Glassman moment, I wanted to follow up on my previous comment. As well-acted as it was, does anyone else believe that there's still work to do? Especially on Glassman's part in terms of moving from understanding to acceptance?
It's great that they've made this step. And the cleaning up of the tie stain had some unspoken beauty to it (Glassman leaning back in, Lea with a great big smile as she understood the gesture). And on a side note, it also helped keep the Glassman/Claire scene from having the distraction of that tie stain sticking around.
But I still feel like the Lea-Glassman journey is still ongoing, and that the ultimate step of pure acceptance is still yet to be attained. And if there's ANYTHING that would do my own heart a lot of good, it would be seeing someone besides Shaun (especially Glassman) show Lea that she truly is loved, appreciated, and accepted for more than her IT skills.
Within the context you suggested, Tony, I had very high expectations for Decrypt. Especially if it were to become the conclusion of episode 9 story arc. I was actually quite sure that it would be the case, at first. But then I watched the CTV promo for episode 9, which is way less dramatic than the ABC one. So, I'm quite confused at the moment as to what exactly to expect. Let'see what happens, and let's hope for something positively emotional. I'm sure, however, that the Lea-Glassy relationship will become stronger and stronger in time. It's the only way possible. They are Shaun's family, after all! 😍
That much is true, Tony. Glassman and Lea’s journey has not reached the end. In a drama series that is rarely the case. But with this scene the rules of engagement have changed. The words spoken can’t made unspoken and bind them; thus. their relationship and understanding of each other have shifted.
The same goes for Glassman’s scene with Claire, although in a very different matter and with different consequences. Claire is a master manipulator, and she pushed every button with the hospital president she needed. He has to react know. He is responsible for the safety and health of his employees, for providing the best care for the patients – and he must answer to the board about all of that. Claire has both, Lim and Glassman, cornered. Just as she pulled strings with Aoki to be reinstated after Melendez had her removed from his team.
In both cases, Glassman has to shift gears now. With Lea, he has to restrain himself and learn to put trust into his surrogate son’s girlfriend. He has to let go bit by bit. With Lim, he has to look closer and decide when it is the right time to act.
I believe you will all enjoy the synopsis of episode 4.10, directed by Freddie Highmore: https://www.spoilertv.com/2021/02/the-good-doctor-episode-410-decrypt.html
Also, Highmore was nominated on the SpoilerTV Performers of the Month for episode 4.08. For those who want to vote for him: https://www.spoilertv.com/2021/02/performers-of-month-january-2021-voting.html
Great news, Allan. Although such a story can only be done once, Lea fending off a cyperattack gives the character some more agency outsite Shaun's orbit. Besides it's a nice break from the focus on the doctors at the hospital.
Very happy. Kelli got the guess right about episode ten! "Decrypt". I remember asking him his hunch about the title.
SOUNDS OF SILENCE - Simon and Garfunkel
"And the people bowed and prayed
To the neon god they made"
Glassy is one of my favourites in The Good Doctor but I HATE how Glassy treats Lea and undermines Lea's confidence with his lack of kindness towards Lea really upsets me.
Since when did Glassy reach Sainthood?
I must be the only one who did not enjoy the Glassy and Lea scene others are raving over and felt the two meals were far better and worthy two of the best scenes.
First meal with Glassy and Morgan
Glassy:- "You two barely know each other, you havn't been dating very long, now your living together, this relationship is moving to fast"
Lea:- Your wrong (that's for 100% Glassy)
Glassy:- You can't prepare for how these evenings can go wrong, families are full of surprises
Shaun:- Like how you don't like Lea
Has Glassy forgotten Shaun and Lea are both adults in their late 20s and not teenagers??? I loved how Shaun pulled Glassy up "Like how you don't like Lea" Shaun by saying this showed his feelings to Glassies dislike of Lea very clearly.
Glassy:- I never actually said that !!!!
Glassy has made it clear he dislikes Lea, he is rude to Lea, has never thanked Lea, never given Lea personal comments and I do not mean her work I am talking about emotions. Glassy cannot even give Lea a proper apology. Then to make matters worse Glassy gives 3 compliments then takes them away in one cutting blow. "You're funny, your smart, and you make Shaun happy. WHICH I GUESS is a good thing"
Why dont you just twist the knife into Lea's heart Glassy as those words really hurt but why should you care as you don't like Lea anyway and would be happy if their relationship fell apart, not even stoppong to consider how Shaun will be broken hearted without Lea and lead to a huge meltdown. Which we may find out after that ABC devastating Promo"
Lea :- "My parents have an issue with Shaun and I just don't want Shaun's PARENT to have a problem with us to"
Glassy: "TO BAD"
Lea was almost PLEADING for Glassy to accept and love her. What bigger compliment could Lea give that call Glassy Shaun's parent. But NO Glassy once more puts Lea down and instead of supporting the girl Shaun loves Glassy made it clear he does not even like Lea. How do you think that makes Lea who already has low self esteem feel, as is rejected by her own parents and Shaun's parent doesn't like her" Everyone needs to feel wanted and loved, instead Lea feels rejected and not good enough through Glassy eyes to be with Shaun despite Shaun loving Lea, it is as if Glassy is jealous of Shaun's love for Lea. Love is not limited. Love is not rationed. Love is never ending and does not run out but grows to infinity and beyond, there are so many different kinds of love.
Part 2 on it's way xx
PART TWO :-
SOUNDS OF SILENCE - Simon and Garfunkel
"And the people bowed and prayed
To the neon god they made"
Let's name 3 times Lea has helped Glassy not for work but out of kindness as Glassy is Shaun's parent
1 Took Glassie to his chemo appointments when Shaun worked, refused to be bullied by Glassy when he wanted to go to see Shaun in Quarantine and insisted on taking Glassy to his final scan where he got the results, then drove Glassy to the hospital to see Shaun.
2. Lea suggests to Shaun if he would like a hug from Glassy who looks shocked as Shaun replied 'I would like that' Shaun gave Glassy a warm hug with Glassy saying to Shaun "I am proud of you" This was due to Lea having great empathy Lea stood back smiling as Glassy and Shaun had stressful days and hugs are proven to reduce stress
3 In Portland it was Lea who saved Shaun from hurting himself not Glassy if Lea had not been there Shaun would have self harmed badly. Shaun told Glassy he had slept with Lea who gave him comfort and it felt different from laying with Carly looking puzzled. Meanwhile Lea was at the shop turned and smiled saying she got mallimars, Lea even remembered Glassy loved them so another act of kindness. Shaun must have told Lea about getting high with Glassy and driving all over the country trying to find Malimars and a high school sweetheart of Glassy as he had felt guilty about what he wrote in the end of year book. Glassy even wanted Shaun to go to his horrible dad's funeral knowing Shaun had a meltdown previously but Shaun refused to go and Glassy went alone.
NOT ONCE has Glassy said thank you to Lea or shown Lea kindness. The famous interview which I loved where Glassy he made it crystal clear he did not like Lea was so rude not even looking at Lea's CV. Lea got the upper hand and did not waste any time on the interview when Lea realised Glassy had no intention of giving her a job. Yet Lea gave Glassy free advice on her way out of the room about several thing which needed doing even saying why his computer was bleeping and why his computer which was driving Glassy crazy as kept bleeping and as the door closed the computer bleeped once more with Glassy shouting LEEAAA who is at the top of her game in IT.
PART THREE ~ FINALE
SOUNDS OF SILENCE - Simon and Garfunkel
"And the people bowed and prayed
To the neon god they made"
I wanted to shout GLASSY LEA IS NOT MADDIE his free spirit daughter who was also a drug addict. Maddie tried so hard to get her dad's attention but failed even turning to drugs to see if that would work as felt her dad did not love her. To make matters worse Glassy tried tough love and refused to let Maddie in the house as Maddie had been taking drugs the result was fatal Maddie took an overdose and died on the grass outside. Glassie wife wanted Maddie to go into rehab but Glassy disagreed with his wife and felt he could FIX Maddie (how while he worked non stop, did Glassy have a God Complex thinking he would be able to get Maddie clean when not even at home??)
BY doing this Glassie killed Maddie who only wanted her dad to show that he loved her. This broke up Glassy marriage as his wife could not forgive him and Glassy has to live with what he did.
For once why could Glassy not show kindness and say to Lea:-
"Thank you Lea as you have really surprised me how much support and love you showed Shaun especially during the pandemic and even more since you are now living together I have watched you both mature and grow. I want you to know I am proud of you and do support you're realtionship with Shaun as have never seen Shaun so happy".
But NO Glassy cannot even do that.
This is why i dilike that scene all are raving about, have they all forgotten how Glassy has been with Lea from the start and Glassy continued this pattern of behaviour by putting Lea down during that scene.
During the meal with Lea's parents interrogating Shaun who used a joke and relieved the tension. I loved it when Lea interupted her judgemental mum and said "Shaun is excellent at his job" showing her support once more. Then Lea showed her support further by choosing Shaun over her parents saying to Shaun 'you don't need to be nice to my parents anymore we won't be seeing them again" handing Shaun her phone to read the text "We need to talk about Shaun" Lea:- "They don't think I'm mature enough to be in a challenging relationship Leave it to my mam she took us both out in one shot".
I enjoyed reading your posting Tony and the thoughts of Daniella as I am also confused and praying for something positive emotionally. All the challenges Shaun and Lea have been through are so unrealistic as have faced more than any of my friends who have been married over 40 years.
I do enjoy replies to my "out of the box way of thinking"
All I ask is please do not use any statistics in your replies and no nasty comments, kindness is free.
Take Care and Stay Safe
Luv Mo xxx
Thanks for the reply, Mo. I can tell you really put your heart into this one, and that this particular plot point resonates deeply.
It resonates with me too. One of my biggest anticipations for this season, once Shaun and Lea got together, was that we would see some more Lea-Glassman development. I figured we'd see it in an incremental way - from rivals of sorts, to an understanding, to an acceptance. And frankly, I would say that this is more of a Glassman journey than a Lea journey, as Lea clearly accepts and respects the role Glassman plays in Shaun's life.
The pandemic obviously threw a wrench into the beginning of the season. And while I don't know if "Plan A" would have included seeing Glassman react to the news of the new relationship, I do know that what we got ended up being a first Season 4 Lea-Glassman interaction in episode eight - well into their relationship (despite Glassman's claims in the episode). But at least we got a step in the right direction - and I thank the others who responded to me that it's A step; not THE final step.
I agree - we all yearn for some sort of acceptance. Some sort of validation. And in a greater sense, we want to feel like we matter. I have no doubt Shaun and Lea give each other this satisfaction, which is the singular most important thing for their relationship to continue growing. But just as Shaun (and several others) have gotten this from others as well, I think seeing Lea get some sort of external validation would go a long way!
I know we've seen it a little validation, from a professional standpoint. After all, Glassman did promote her from that part-time job that had Lea nabbing French Fries - to the Head of IT. And I'm absolutely THRILLED by the 4.10 synopsis that looks to build on this fact. Thank you, Allan, for the heads up!
But even so, I'm sure Lea wants more than just a "job well done" from someone who means so much. Just as anyone wants to be seen by more than their looks, I would argue that the same is true from an intellectual standpoint.
As you point out, Mo, Lea wouldn't do all of those graciously kind things for Glassman if it were just a friendly favor to Shaun; I would say Glassman has come to mean a lot to Lea as well. Lea has gone above and beyond on a number of occasions, and one of my biggest hopes in the future is that Glassman comes to give her that very credit.
Hey, Mo.
As a tribute to the passion you put in your comment, I’ll share with you that my biggest hope is that Shaun, Lea, Glassman, and Debbie will end up as a happy family in the end.
That’s my weak point: I love harmony in things. But I also know that it’s very difficult to achieve a goal such as harmony in a drama series. And even if you ultimately achieve it, it’s never without overcoming obstacles and challenges, at every turn. That’s the very definition of drama. So, if I’m very lucky, I’ll get the happy ending I wish. But, who knows?
In the meantime, here’s my opinion about Glassman.
The character was willingly conceived as a very human one. And by human, I mean with a lot of flaws. He’s far from being a saint and he would be the first one to admit all his sins. He made a lot of very big mistakes in his life and payed the full price for that. In 2x04 Glassman himself, talking to the hallucination of his daughter, said “I died that day, Maddie”. So, what appreciate of the character is its very humanity. He knows his mistakes, he knows that family is the most important thing, and throughout the series he tries his hardest to redeem himself. In this respect, Shaun was depicted from the very beginning as his path to redemption. Glassman’s firm determination to ensure Shaun’s success is the proof of that. He pushes away everything and everybody to get to his goal, to the point of risking his own position as president of the hospital.
Glassman made mistakes, not only with Maddie, but with Shaun as well. He’s far from being perfect. No parent is. But he always tries his hardest for what he believes is right. Sometimes he’s wrong, I agree, but I have no doubts whatsoever that he loves Shaun immensely, like his own parents never did.
I agree with you, Glassy was probably wrong in pretending that Shaun forgave his father, and he was likely influenced partly by his own experiences with his daughter. When I watched 3x10 Friends and Family for the first time, I remember getting angry with the writers for that particular storyline. I kept telling myself that Glassy would rather die than get Shaun hurt again. But, after watching the episode a second time, and watching it in combination with the following episode 3x11 Fractured, I finally got it right. The Good Doctor’s scripts usually have different layers of meaning, and it takes more than one view to analyze them fully.
Ultimately, confronting his parents again, was exactly what Shaun needed to free himself from his life-long trauma. If you really think about it, Shaun kept going on just trying to forget everything that happened to him, refusing therapy, never really facing his pain. Just think about his aversion for any kind of parental figure, evident in season 1 (“I don’t need a father, I hate fathers”), or when he told Claire about his strategy to handle his family issues (“I try not to think about the past. It doesn’t help” 3x01).
Being forced to face his pain, pushed Shaun to finally open up about his true feelings, his fears to be abandoned even from the people who loved him the most, like Glassman (“My dad didn’t want me. My mom chose him over me. Carly now hates me. Lea will get tired of me. You’ll get sick of me. I do everything wrong” 3x11).
So, all things considered, forcing him to go back to Wyoming was probably the right thing to do. And Glassman didn’t go to Shaun’s father’s funeral. They all got to the airport the following morning and left Casper for good.
That said, I believe that the work to build the relationship between Glassy and Lea is far from over. But the problem has never been as simple as Glassy not liking Lea (she perceived it that way, of course). On the contrary, I think that he actually likes her. A lot. Otherwise, he wouldn’t have pushed Shaun to confess his feelings to Lea, or even told Shaun that Lea was inside the brewpub wreckage, knowing that he would have risked his life to save her. From Glassman that was a very huge act of respect for Shaun (as an adult person) and his right to choose to try and save the woman he loved.
Glassy simply finds it difficult to acknowledge his feelings, because of his very attitude, and because of his extreme protectiveness towards Shaun. Shaun is an adult, I get it. But, as a parent, I can at least sympathize with Glassy and understand his point of view, knowing where he comes from.
I’m convinced that there’s still a lot to be added to the story, and that Parenting has been the very first step of a long path. The mutual trust that has been established between Glassman and Lea is the cornerstone on which to develop their relationship fully. And I think that this development will impact significantly the very relationship between Shaun and Glassy.
In this context, I loved the Lea-Glassman scene very, very much.
Daniela
I did not explain myself properly. I am only speaking about that one scene members are saying was the best and I totally disagree and it looked like Glassy had been elevated to an icon to be worshiped so my lyrics were sarcasm.
Did you hear an apology to Lea
Did you hear a thank you to Lea
Did you EVER hear Glassy say I care about you to Lea
Glassy has never once hugged Lea
That awful promo clip Glassy says to Lim 'i care about you"
Glassy has never told Lea that he cares about her once, yet he can tell Lim.
Is it pride?
All I was doing was pointing out how much Lea has helped Glassy and not once been recognised by Glassy for her kindness, yes for her work in IT but not for herself and when someone like Lea has very low self esteem being told by her partners dad that he loves her or if hGlassy can't use the word love use 'care for' or if Glassy cannot even do that give Lea a hug with no words spoken as often non verbal can mean so much more and would really give Lea a boost.
If I was Lea i would be so hurt if my partners parents had not shown me love, they would hug me warmly every time we stayed and tell me they loved me and that when they hug me they felt a sense of peace, as am a very warm lassie who spreads joy.
Sorry about getting the funeral wrong my memory is still flawed and I got mixed up thinking Glassy went home with Shaun and Lea then flew back to the funeral to support Shaun's mum who Glassy had kept in touch with her
After that devastating Promo with no though for those with mental health problem and the debate that followed I had a huge anxiety attack resulting in me being rushed to hospital as suffered had a mini stroke so my left eye and arm and brain swollen.
I deleted every posting i made and will not mention or watch that destructive Promo again. The story line does affect others who suffer from anxiety even more so during a lockdown. I am an empath with an eidetic memory, the mini stroke has affected my memory.
So I repeat....
Why could Glassy not have said one kind word to Lea without taking it back in the same sentence at the table and talked down to Lea as if Lea is a child.
Lea was begging for acceptance have a look at Lea's body language and how sad her eyes are when Glassy spoke, both at the meal and while they were alone.
Then Lea regained her composure and wiped the stain from Glassy tie saying Shaun would hate it. Glassy pulled away then allowed Lea to wipe his tie as knew Lea was right and he had to talk to Claire who may have been distracted by a stained tie.
During that moment Lea was showing Glassy that she has been living with Shaun first as a girlfriend now as Shaun's lover, Shaun's partner and knows what upsets Shaun very well.
Shaun and Lea are in their late 20s they are not teenagers yet Glassy cannot even respect their relationship by wishing them happiness instead he lectured them at the meal. I was so pleased Lea spoke out saying he was wrong and Shaun put Glassy on the spot by saying You don't like Lea and the look on Shauns face was one of annoyance that his mentor still did not accept Lea. If Glassy is not careful he will lose Shaun who would choose Lea over his mentor just as Lea chose Shaun over her parents .
Glassy cannot seem to let go of Shaun who is now an adult, an excellent surgeon and has won the heart and trust of Lea who makes Shaun more. Even Debbie has said to Glassy that Shaun and Lea are adults and to allow Shaun to live his own life. Glassy got a chance to live a new life after surviving cancer and fell in love with Debbie so why is Glassy not willing to give Shaun the wonderful feelings of being in love
Thank you for your reply and I repeat I am only commenting on the private chat all were putting as No 1 moment of the show while I viewed the chat from a completely different perspective and found it very upsetting to see Lea being put down once more by Glassy
Luv Mo x
If anybody is experiencing mental distress, please do not hesitate to seek professional support.
Many great thoughts about the Glassy-Lea relationship and their scene in 4x08. I agree with all of you saying that the scene is only a start for Glassy to trust Lea and accept her in Shaun's life, and to even show that he likes her. As i had mentioned, my reasons for loving the scene were because it was heartwarming and well-acted but also because it was a necessary discussion between the 2 of them given their conflicts in the past. I mentioned also that I've had mixed feelings about Glassman because of how he unfairly treated Lea and never being thankful for what she did for Shaun or him but only focusing on how she could hurt Shaun. Glassman has been depicted as a very flawed character, often cynical, who very rarely smiles and doesn't thank people, but his dedication to helping Shaun and always wanting the best for him shows that he can have a good heart. I've always felt that there was room for Lea in his (seemingly cold) heart too, that seeing Lea be so good and so loving to Shaun and maybe with knowing her more, that he couldn't help but grew attached to her. It would be moving to see Lea break through Glassman's shield.
Covid derailed a lot of things, and without it maybe we would have seen a scene with the 2 of them in the first few episodes, with Glassman reacting to Shea being a couple, them moving in or with him promoting Lea...The latter I wish we had seen because although it's great that Lea was promoted quickly, we haven't seen the development of this, and it implies that Glassman would have had a discussion with her about this promotion. Their scenes in 4x08 makes it seem like they haven't spoken at all since she was interviewed by him! And it's doubtful that Glassman wouldn't have already mentioned the " moving in too fast" to Shaun well before the dinner scene. I know Richard Schiff couldn't film for a few episodes because of covid, but even if he hadn't been sick, it's unlikely that there would have been such a discussion shown in an episode between Glassman and Shaun, because of a lack of time and because the writers/producers probably thought it wouldn't be important.
Regarding Glassman's behaviour towards Lea, at some point i thought that maybe he was jealous of Lea for being able to reach out to Shaun rather easily, for making him learn things seemingly effortlessly and for contributing to making him accept touching in some situations...
In any case, I hope to see other scenes with the 2 of them, with Glassman finally showing understanding and even affection towards Lea. The writers/producers know what people liked and disliked, they must have seen that many fans liked their scenes in Parenting, so hopefully it will propel them to continue on developing their relation.
Regarding 4x10, it's so cool that it will be quite heavily focused on Lea! We expected/hoped that it would be the case given the episode title, but although we have been seeing Lea a hell of a lot more so far in season 4 than season 3, but i still had trouble believing that they would dare to give the character such a focus before season 5.
A part of the synopsis intrigued me: "to prove herself". The sentence could have stopped before these words, so adding them really points to her lack of self-esteem. That's also why i feel like her promotion was too soon; she could have saved the day in 4x10 and as a result be promoted as head of IT department. It's also odd to me that, since she was an automotive engineer who was offered a promotion because considered very qualified, then promoted as head of IT department at the hospital, that she would feel not capable and not worthy of the job. In fact I've always thought that her lack of self-esteem was more on a personal level, in her relationship to others, than professional. We saw her doubt her career path, but not really her abilities in the field. Unless, she needs to feel useful and needed, and compared to Shaun and his colleagues she feels out-of-place and not useful enough...
Given the synopsis for this episode, it must be in 4x11 that there is the road-trip-that-may-not-be-a-road-trip with Lea and her striped tomatoe. Given previous seasons' patterns, 4x10 and 4x11 should be important and even pivotal episodes, so it's great that Lea seems to have an important role in both of them. I'm really looking forward to seeing the promo pictures for 4x10 and reading the synopsis for 4x11!
The „to prove herself“ might allude to her general issues with self-esteem or/and to her wishing to prove herself to Glassman as employer and “parent”.
Also, we should consider an important line from “Hubert” about her general mindset: “I thought I could help my bullheaded brother save the shop, be a part of something I was really passionate about.”
Lea wants her work to matter. And while Shaun is busy saving lives, she is basically a desk jockey.
Lest not forget, although Shaun loves her dearly, she is kind of an outsider to his world made up by medical professionals. There might also be some residue from the precious episode. As we hear Shaun say in the promo, the finds his crush to be “very talented” – so what Lea might bother besides the kiss/crush itself could very well be a general fear to be able to compete in a field that matters to Shaun most: medicine.
That's indeed probably that Andreas, Lea wants her work to matter. It goes with her so-called neediness, with her needing recognition. And you're right about her probably feeling even less worthy after what could have happened in 4x09, and this could make her fear that Shaun could get tired of her.
On another subject, I wonder if the show will have another unplanned hiatus because the guy I talked about in another post, who works around the set as the driver of the cast and crew and has a blog with some non-spoilerish pictures, made a new post saying that there was a case of covid on the set last week (he posted yesterday, so he must have meant the week at the end of January); as a result the set was shut down for 5 days and they were not able to start shooting 4x11. If they started filming again only a few days ago, it seems quite difficult to end filming and properly edit episode 4x11 in time for it to air at the end of February...
Oh, no. Not another hiatus! I hope everyone is fine. What a terrible situation!
>>this could make her fear that Shaun could get tired of her.
A sentiment that would reflect on Shaun’s break-down in 3.11, when he expressed the same fear of Lea getting tired of him to Glassman. We might look out for something similar happening in the upcoming episodes.
Another forced production break would be quite unfortunate for the overall reception of season 4. Not everyone in the audience is so understanding of the current production difficulties. I’ve seen quite ignorant reactions in social media.
We hope that they are able to keep up with the schedule but it seems difficult. Still, I don't think that the show should face a new hiatus. If they are not certain I would prefer for them to re schedule the come back for February 22. The series is something to be seen with a very open mind, something that requires analysis and that gives the audience something to think of but everything as part of a very well structured harmony within the episodes, when there are so many breaks that harmony breaks too and ignorance becomes part of daily life discussion.
Complicated situation. I thought the recordings were going well.
The promo pictures for “Decrypt” are online, and it seems as if we get some tense one-to-one character drama for #Shea in a server room.
https://www.dgepress.com/abc/shows/thegooddoctor/episodes/decrypt/
There might very well be some issues carried over from the previous episode…
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